Think you've been scammed?
Contact us on 13 25 85 or visit your local branch immediately.
What is a romance scam?
A scammer pretends to be someone who is interested in a romantic relationship or friendship in order to gain your trust before manipulating you to send money, gifts, or personal information.
Scammers will create fake profiles and use social media, and dating apps, or websites to find people looking for love or friendship. They will often shower you with nice messages or calls, making you feel special. This is often referred to as ‘love bombing’.
While your feelings towards this person are genuine, they are not reciprocated. The scammer may persuade you to keep the relationship a secret or isolate you from your real friends or family – something nobody who truly cared for you would do.
The conversations can last days, weeks, or sometimes even months as the scammer waits for the perfect moment to ask for money. They may say it’s for a plane ticket to come visit, a medical emergency, or a family problem. Whatever the excuse, the scammer steals your money then disappears, leaving you to pick up the pieces.
Signs to look out for.
- The relationship moves quickly. Very soon after connecting online, they say they have strong feelings for you. They flatter you and make you feel very special even though you haven’t known them for long.
- They ask to chat through a different app. The scammer quickly tries to move your chat from social media or online dating platform to a free messaging platform like WhatsApp or Google Chat.
- There is always an excuse. There always seems to be some reason why they can’t meet in person or over video chat. Often they say they’re overseas or working remotely where Wi-Fi is unavailable. If they do agree to a video call, it’s of bad quality or may be altered using artificial intelligence.
- Money is needed urgently. After gaining your trust, they tell you a tragic story and ask for money, gifts, or your bank account/credit card details. They will appear desperate and make you feel guilty if you do not agree.
- Investment opportunities. The scammer encourages you to pursue an investment opportunity that seems too good to be true or they offer to show you how to make ‘easy money’.
Protecting yourself against romance scams.
Keep your social media profile private.
- Be careful about sharing personal information about your family, job, or even hobbies online. Scammers may use this information to steal your identity or blackmail you
- Don’t accept friendship requests from people you don’t know.
Be careful about what you publish on public forums, like Facebook groups.
- Scammers look for individuals who might be more susceptible to manipulation, such as those discussing personal problems or seeking emotional support
- They identify topics or issues that interest their potential victims and feign interest to make a connection.
Check who you’re talking to.
- Always verify the identity of the person you're communicating with. You can do this by using a reverse image search to check if their photos are stolen from other profiles. How to run a reverse image search
- Never send money, card or bank details, or personal information to someone you’ve only spoken to online, even if you have been messaging for a long time.
Tell your friends or family members.
- If you're in a new relationship, share the good news with some trusted people in your life. The person you are dating should be excited to meet your friends and family, not ask you to keep it a secret
- The fresh eyes of your family and friends may help spot any red flags or inconsistencies that you may have overlooked.
How to spot a fake profile.
- Images that are blurry, unclear, or possibly AI-generated
- Limited photos or posts, or photos and posts that were all published on the same day
- Too many or not enough friends or followers
- Few comments, likes, or shares on their social media profile from other people.
Reporting a romance scam.
- If you believe your bank account or the bank account of a loved one has been compromised, contact Beyond Bank on 13 25 85 or visit your local branch
- If you or someone you know has incurred financial loss to a romance scam, report the scam to the Australian Government’s cybercrime website at cyber.gov.au/report
- Help disrupt fraudsters and stop future scams by reporting any attempted scam or suspicious activity to ScamWatch: https://www.scamwatch.gov.au/report-a-scam
- If you need support, IDCARE provides free, confidential support and guidance to those impacted by fraud, scams, identity theft or compromise. You can call them toll-free on 1800 595 160 or visit https://www.idcare.org/
How to help someone who’s being scammed.
It can be very difficult to recognise a scam when you are in one. If you suspect that someone you know and love is being manipulated by a scammer, it’s important to step in.
- Be prepared for the person to avoid or deflect your questions. Victims are often embarrassed or afraid to share what they are going through and don’t want to risk being seen as incapable or vulnerable. The scammer may have also coached the person to avoid conversations about the relationship. While it can be frustrating, the best way to proceed is to remain patient and supportive.
- Investigate red flags and find evidence of the scam. For example, run reverse image searches on photos of supposed admirers to find out if they belong to who they say they do. If possible, encourage your friend or family member to join you in the investigation – it might help them feel more in control of the situation.
- Research real life stories and point out any similarities. Here’s an example from Scamwatch
- If they have sent money or gifts to the suspected scammer, encourage them to contact their bank. You can contact Beyond Bank on 13 25 85 or by visiting your local branch.
Supporting a victim of a scam.
Dr Kate Gould, neuropsychologist and Senior Researcher at Monash University, explains how best to support someone who has been scammed.